Should a Christian forgive someone
without that person's repentance? CAN a Christian forgive someone
without that person's repentance? This is certainly an important issue.
Forgiveness is needed by all
(Romans 3:23). In Romans 4:7-8, the Bible says, "Blessed are those whose
lawless deeds are forgiven, And whose sins are covered; Blessed is the
man to whom the LORD shall not impute sin." One of THE best
circumstances on earth is when forgiveness is realized between two
previously alienated parties.
Jesus had a desire to forgive. In
Luke 23:34, Jesus' own words from the cross for his murderers were,
"Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do." Later, the
remission (forgiveness) of sins that Jesus pleaded for was realized when
those on Pentecost did what Peter commanded them to do to receive this
forgiveness (Acts 2:38). Even though Jesus Himself pleaded for them,
they had to do what was necessary to BE forgiven.
In Luke 17:3-4, Jesus taught His
disciples, "Take heed to yourselves. If your brother sins against you,
rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him. And if he sins against you
seven times in a day, and seven times in a day returns to you, saying,
'I repent,' you shall forgive him." Clearly, Jesus taught that
forgiveness MUST be preceded by the offender's repentance. Without it
there can be no forgiveness (Luke 13:3; 2 Peter 3:9). If repentance were
not required, how could the church withdraw from a disorderly brother or
sister (2 Thessalonians 3:6,14-15)? We would simply have to forgive them
and the matter would be closed.
Also, there would be no need for
Godly sorrow if forgiveness were meted out while the person was still
guilty of and engaged in their trespass (2 Corinthians 7:9-10). In Acts
8:22, we read Peter's similar instruction to Simon the sorcerer: "Repent
therefore of this your wickedness, and pray God if perhaps the thought
of your heart may be forgiven you."
When one sins against us, we are
to make every effort at reconciliation. In Matthew 18:15-17, the Bible
says, "Moreover if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his
fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your
brother. But if he will not hear, take with you one or two more, that
'by the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.
And if he refuses to hear them, tell it to the church. But if he refuses
even to hear the church, let him be to you like a heathen and a tax
collector."
At least two points of emphasis
should be noted in the preceding passage: First, when we have been the
"victim" of a sin, WE - the offended one - are not to wait for the
offender to come to us, we are to go to him (her). Second, if there was
such a thing as forgiveness without repentance, then this entire process
of reconciliation would not be necessary. The whole point of it in
regaining our brother is to get the brother to recognize and repent of
the sin.
On the other side of this issue is
the attitude of the victim. In Mark 11:25-26, Jesus taught, "And
whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against any one,
forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your
trespasses. But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in
heaven forgive your trespasses." The heart, or desire, to forgive can
and should be present already in the person who was sinned against. In
the lesson of the prodigal son, the father's heart was full of
forgiveness and compassion for his son. However, by his coming home and
penitent confession the prodigal showed his desire to be forgiven (Luke
15:20-24).
While we should hold no ill will
nor bitterness in our hearts toward the offender, the "process" of
forgiveness cannot come to completion until the sinner repents and asks
forgiveness. When this happens, we are to forgive the sinful one without
any hesitation (Matthew 18:35).
Then, even the angels and
heaven can rejoice (Luke 15:10).
David Decker